Dear Blogoshpere, I have been remiss, and I apologise. Much to my chagrin, many months have passed since last I posted. Considering how much has transpired during this time, however, I believe you will forgive my incommunicado period. Please know, it was not my intention to neglect.
Firstly, you be pleased to know that since January, I have been happily adjusting to life in my NEW HOME! My new humans are quite excellent, and their training is coming along nicely. They have learned well how to share the bed with a feline of my, ahem, heft. But, Blogosphere, I am getting ahead of myself; for much preceded this happy development.
Unfortunately, I had a bit of an accident. Worry not, I am quite alright. I have a slight limp, but I believe it adds character. I suppose I must divulge the nature of this accident, though I do have some embarrassment around it. Primary Human 'drolly' described this incident as 'Mike's attempted acrobatics', but she was never particularly clever with words. As I have mentioned previously, I consider personal development to be of the highest importance. I am not ashamed to tell you, Blogosphere, that most of my endeavors have been more... intellectual, in nature. Frankly, physicality has never been my strong suit. Well, recognizing that I had been neglectful of this area of my life, I decided to do what any rational, self-actualized, 23 pound cat would do: I would take up gymnastics. Though I have never been much of a sports enthusiast, I have always admired the grace and strength of such athletes. I chose the balance beam as my first event. I imagine that most beginning gymnasts start with a beam close to the ground, but I thought perhaps a greater challenge would better compel me to success. Furthermore, the only appropriate instrument happened to be located at approximately 8 feet... up. Never one to hesitate, I charged toward my target, leaping and climbing my way up a vertical post. Once atop the beam, though somewhat unnerved by the height, I rallied and continued with my routine. You should have seen me, Blogosphere, I leaped and twirled, somersaulted and flipped. Just at the zenith of my performance, however, I did not so much soar as I did plummet. Although I did fall gracefully, I also fell hard. I sustained soft tissue damage to my paw. I was laid up for quite some time, and sadly, my gymnastics career was over before it began.
It was not long after this, that a lovely young couple came, and became quite smitten with me. As soon as I was reasonably healed, I came to reside with them; and I must say, I am quite content. There is another cat, Loretta, that is tolerably good company. The house is furnished with all that I need--including a litter box which accommodates the fuller-figured cat. The food is good, the window sills are warm, the pats are frequent, and life is good. And so, Bologosphere, I retire. I know you will miss my insights, but I believe it is always best to 'leave them wanting more'. I wish you all the very best; and if you will now excuse me, I need to go lie on my desk.
